Jennifer Lopez revealed on the Howard Stern Show that she does not believe any of her past partners ever “truly loved” her. The performer and actress spoke candidly about her relationships and emotional growth during an October 15 interview on SiriusXM.
Stern asked her, “Do you think you’ve truly been loved?” After a pause, Lopez answered unequivocally, “No.” She went on: “What I learned, it’s not that I’m not lovable. It’s that they’re not capable. They don’t have it in them.”
She added nuance to the statement: “They gave me what they had. They gave me all of it, every time. All the rings, all the things I could ever want. The houses, the rings, the marriage, all of it. But…”
Lopez admitted that her own self-worth also played a role. “They didn’t [love me],” she said in response to Stern’s follow-up, and immediately added, “And I didn’t love myself.”
She also described her divorce from Ben Affleck as transformative. “When I got divorced this last time, it was the best thing that ever happened to me,” she said, reflecting on the therapy and coaching she pursued afterward.
Cutting Ties With the Past
Lopez didn’t just distance emotionally — she also joked that she cuts ties physically. When Stern asked if she ever checks up on past partners, she answered, “Once I’m done, you’re dead to me.”
Still, she clarified she does not carry anger in those choices. “Not dead to me, but definitely, it’s over, I’m going to move on,” she told Stern.
Lopez has been married four times (to Ojani Noa, Cris Judd, Marc Anthony, and Ben Affleck) and was engaged to Alex Rodriguez.
Though she confessed she never felt fully loved in those relationships, Lopez also said she has “truly loved” others. “I’ve loved. But not gotten that reciprocated love,” she told Stern.
As she moves forward, Lopez says her focus has shifted inward. She now emphasizes self-awareness and self-love as the foundation for any future connection.